I punched a man in the face today. He probably deserved it. Then I did it again. We were off looking for this Stag Lord guy and we came across a bush full of these berries some other dude wanted. I went in to get some and was attacked by a swarm of spiders. I knew they were there in the beginning and I felt this was a good time to practice stomping vermin for practice for the Stag Lord. After several fiery stomps, I found the others lighting torches to burn them. The biggest threat were the actual thorns. I believe Faldal was the only one who didn’t come in and play, but that’s ok. I haven’t met many dwarves, but my guess was that he was afraid. He and I always find ourselves getting in spats over the Fey, I just want to hang the one that threw bark in my stew, hang him up, and beat him until candy falls out. That will be at a later date.
After the whole berry thing, I went on looking for the Stag Lord guy, finding this farm where some bandits were raping an pillaging. Everyone seemed so shocked and disgusted by the actions, but they are bandits with a very poor boss. Most bandit leaders at least go and let their men get laid legitimately through taverns and whore houses. We took at them like a pack of lions to a herd of antelope. We decimated them rather quickly. That Az guy is pretty useful. I went around the other side. I’ve noticed I’m a lot faster than normal recently, I was on the other side, beating down bandits before they were even ready. We saved this woman and her daughter who my guess was raped and pillaged. They weren’t the brightest tools in the shed, but I claimed the mother as mine. I will visit there every once in a while and she will make me dinner. There’s nothing like a home cooked meal. That gives me the halfling at Olegs’ and the one in the barn. I hope they don’t expect marriage.
So what ended up happening was we interrogated the bandits. Faldal is a man of words while I am a man of fist. We did make a good team. The man told us everything and I got to pull down his pants and mutilate his privates with a palm strike of acidy painful doom. I wanted him to suffer, but Restinal knocked him out. I don’t like Restinal too much, always ruining the plans. I guess “kill all bandits” is better than making a man who made my woman suffer, even though she wasn’t my woman until afterwards, suffer himself. We ended up bringing him back to conciousness and made him dig graves for him and his buddy. I still think it would have been better if his groin burned during that whole thing, but what can a man do?